Personal · Thoughts

The Change of Seasons

Do any of the rest of you get that feeling in your chest like a heaviness you love when the summer turns to fall?

I remember last year, early morning, sitting in my backyard reading and drifting in and out of thought. I watched as a tree lost every single leaf it once held on to the grass (mainly dirt) beneath. It was imagery for the end of a season of time, and the beginning of a new one.

“All the leaves are falling.”

I’ve always looked forward to the fall. The cold creeping in through the windows feels similar to the warmth of spring after a long winter. Fall means the clothes that I love to wear: flannels, sweaters (not the nerdy kind. the cool kind), jeans and my boots. I look forward to the breath in the air and the chill on my skin and walks around the park to watch the sunrise. It’s quietest when my body’s most tired, both inside and out.

I look forward to early morning devotions with my Bible while wearing a hoodie. Something about the cold makes me more sensitive to the Warmth.

I won’t lie, I get down on Pumpkin Spice from time to time. The flavor is more “Nostalgia” than “Pumpkin” anyway.  In my childhood not so far past, I remember sitting on the fireplace while drinking hot chocolate, even though Texas rarely drops below 50 degrees. You make the best with what you have.

I live at the top of a hill, so the rare times that it ices over are the best. Myself and local neighborhood gang would spend out whole day sledding down the hill on trash can lids, plywood, or anything else that looked remotely like a sled. I always felt bad for the mailman who always delivered on those days. His name was Tom from New York, or at least that’s how we knew him,  and we’d always run hot chocolate out to him whenever we saw him coming.

The first week of October is my favorite. That’s when you start to feel the change in weather as the planet’s axis starts to shift. The warm cider making a warmth in my chest beneath all of those layers keeping the cold at bay, but not so far away that I can’t feel it.

I want to sit in it and be in it and stay in it while it’s here. Every year, it feels like a friend who comes back around to remind me to slow down and inspires me to create. It makes me more introspective and nostalgic, which is good as long as you can make sure you pull yourself out of it. Fall is the season I’ve always learned the most from and during, so here’s to seeing what this one has in store for me.

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